For Ladies Only - (& for Men who want an explanation of why women spend so long in the loo ! ! ) Do You Agree?

Public toilets for women. You have to laugh because it's soooo true!!!








When you have to visit a public toilet, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the cubicle doors. Every cubicle is occupied.





Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the cubicle. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants!








The dispenser for the modern 'seat covers' (invented by someone's Mum, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your bag on the door hook, if there was one, so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mum would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!) down with your pants and assume ' The Stance. In this position, your aging, toneless, thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down, but having not taken time to wipe the seat or to lay toilet paper on it, you hold 'The Stance.'








To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser.


In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, 'Dear, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!' Your thighs shake more.











You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your bag (the bag around your neck, that now you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time). That would have to do, so you crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail.











Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work. The door hits your bag, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest and you and your bag topple backward against the tank of the toilet. 'Occupied!' you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, while losing your footing altogether and sliding down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try.








You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, 'You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get. By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire hose against the inside of the bowl and spraying a fine mist of water that covers your bum and runs down your legs and into your shoes.








The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force and you grab onto the empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too.


At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a sweet wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks.





You can't figure out how to operate the taps with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women still waiting. You are no longer able to smile politely to them. A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED it?)











You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, 'Here, you just might need this.


As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used and left the men's toilet. Annoyed, he asks, 'What took you so long and why is your bag hanging around your neck?











This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with any public rest rooms/toilets (rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers that other commonly asked question about why women go to the toilets in pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your bag and hand you Kleenex under the door.











This HAD to be written by a woman! No one else could describe it so accurately.

For Ladies Only - (%26amp; for Men who want an explanation of why women spend so long in the loo ! ! ) Do You Agree?
As a man who has asked that very question several times I thank you for the enlightenment, I will always give the females I am out with the benefit of my new knowledge, This could help me to avoid many ice cold stares %26amp; painful slaps around the face. THANK YOU..
Reply:Quite true. I always carry sanitising wipes and have to clean every loo first! Also have a handy pack of tissues. I think I have toilet ocd lol.
Reply:LOL, True, true, true.
Reply:well worth the read!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





cant count howmany times that happened to me!!!!!!!!!1





eww!!!!!!!!!!!hahhahhahah!!!!!!!!
Reply:*sobbing* finally, you men will understand!
Reply:Aaahahhahahahaha!!!
Reply:i have never had an experience like that.....goodness, i hope i dont ever have to go through that...that sounded like hell! LoL! where r u using public restrooms? hahahaha!
Reply:True Very True lol
Reply:Lol, someone's been watching me in the loo!
Reply:This is oh so very true. =]





x
Reply:lol funny one :) !!!
Reply:Fantastic well worth the read


TY
Reply:lol that must of took ages
Reply:lol to true :D
Reply:Very funny! I love it. Thanks for the laugh.
Reply:Yes I Would Feel Sorry For Anyone In This Position, Whereas I Always Atomatically Check For Toilet Roll At Any Toilet.
Reply:It just depends on where I am. I have went into the male's bathroom before(couldn't hold it), c'mon ladies I know I am not the only one who has done this before.
Reply:i take a long time in the toilet because i like to read books in there.





One time i even got 999 lines on tetris but it stops counting once you get past 999.
Reply:bloody heck! now that has never happened to me before well not all of it, but i can relate to some of it lol
Reply:hi this has so happened to me but when it did happen to me i was at the most packed bar in town and. and when i went to wash my hands i set my purse down and of course it totally got soaked from the overflowing sinks lol and then i started to dry my purse off in a frantic with a roll of toilet paper and some drunk girl asked me if i was trying to steal the roll of toilet paper she was laughing loudly at herself so everyone else laughed loudly lol so i think i beat you lol hope this helps i know carry little tissues in my purse and never set my purse down anywhere always around my neck also. lol
Reply:boy! i think i would be in tears if all of this happened to me in one toilet experience! lol
Reply:Dear Jill, So, what is the question? I just assumed that I stood for what seemed liked hours waiting on the lady I was with that day that she was indulging on some kind of crazy, hot, kinky, anonymous lesbian sex or maybe she was having trouble trying to get her syringe to work, everyone knows that the loo is a common place for people to do drugs. Now, I think that I have better insight on why you girls take so long!! Loved your story!!
Reply:Though it took a long time to read, it was worth it;


Many a times similar incidents has happened with my mom and girlfriend due to lack of proper sanitation, hygiene and maintenance in many of the public loos in Mumbai and they go on narrating these experiences to me.


So when I travel with either of them , I just dont question them abt the time taken coz the reason's the same everytime.


A peculiar incident was narrated by my gf who told tht she used to hum songs to show the toilet is occupied coz there was no latch on the door............Hilarious


So I agree with u ........lolz
Reply:i wouldn't go into a public loo ewwww grosss
Reply:where i live[hick town]we don't usually HAVE toilet seat covers,and we're still alive[sloooooooowwwwwwly dying of boredom]
Reply:Boy is this so called 'question' long!



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